Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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