i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
