My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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