he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Randomize
