I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
