margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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