Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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