Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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