So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize