This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
