Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
