Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
