your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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