can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
