Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
