I feel like I'm in dance class right now
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
porn star boner night. come get it.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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