Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I supernannyed him into submission
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
