No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Randomize
