i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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