He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i was born a porn star she said
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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