is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
