i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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