my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
