I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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