The maid of honor just puked.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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