Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
