The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
