Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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