Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
