For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
