Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
3 2 1 whiskey
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
