Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize