Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
