i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
