the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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