This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I have demons in me.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
