1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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