he puts the penis in happiness.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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