You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
