You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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