Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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