Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
