I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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