There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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