So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
