id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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