no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
