White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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