If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
