69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
