You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
You're earring is so big in my mouth
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
