Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize